Why Small Groups Are Vital for Spiritual Growth
Listen: “Lean on Me” by Bill Withers
In 2019, after a collapse of my vocation, my marriage, and my faith, I felt humiliated and full of shame, even lost and disoriented. I thought to myself: “I need to get my shit together.” I decided to start attending small groups focused on recovery. In fact, I found a home group with several small group meetings available every day of the week. I started attending a small group every morning and evening almost every day of the week for a season. I needed it. I needed a home with friends who would walk through my pain and sorrow. As Bill Withers wrote and sang:
Sometimes in our lives
We all have pain
We all have sorrow
But if we are wise
We know that there’s always tomorrow
Lean on me
When you’re not strong
And I’ll be your friend
I’ll help you carry on…
As a teenager, I committed my life to following Jesus and felt called to be a pastor. It was a major change. I had been using recreational drugs for a couple of years, and most of my friends did the same thing. I needed some strong support to change the trajectory of my life, and I found that support in a small group. Two of my friends (Brad and Stan Nickle), myself, and my church youth worker (Mike Paden) started meeting together weekly. It was a simple structure. We would feed a piranha in the fish tank, share about our struggles, go over some bible study homework, and pray. We did this for a year or so and then we each started new small groups. It started a pattern in my life. Small groups have been a part of my life for over forty years.
It’s interesting how many powerful movements throughout history have started in small groups. When Jesus started his work and mission, he didn’t create an institution. He called a few students together—The Twelve Disciples. It was a small group. They prayed together, studied the Torah together, ate together, fished together, and cared for broken people through a grace-based community. Jesus left his disciples with the mission to go and make students (open-hearted learners) who live in grace-based communities to care for the outcasts and the marginalized and the broken. Today there are millions of small groups and churches around the world. (Unfortunately, some of these communities have certainly lost their way and don’t look much like Jesus and his early followers. Church history reveals both horrific impostures and beautiful incarnations of Jesus.)
Alcoholics Anonymous started as a small group in 1935. It’s mission was (and is) to support people who wanted to stop drinking. The principles of AA have help millions of people around the world live sober and spiritual lives. Today there are over 100,000 small groups around the world.
When I started Vineyard Church in Kansas City, Missouri in 1990, we started with small groups. I was leading three different small groups each week, and I would also train people to lead small groups. We had a simple format: worship singing (optional), Bible teaching and discussion, sharing of personal struggles, and prayer. By 1992, we had four or five small groups with over fifty people actively engaged. By 2018, we had close to 600 small groups with over 3,000 people actively engaged.
Why are small groups vital for spiritual growth? Two things come to mind based on my observations of more than forty years of small group involvement. First of all, vulnerability and honesty occur best in small groups. It’s hard to hide in a small group. When you attend large group events, you can definitely experience spiritual connection, inspiration, and transcendence (like a worship service, a music concert, or a sporting event). It can be very powerful. However, a large group is not the best place to make new friends or share your pain and sorrow. Vulnerability and honesty are vital for spiritual growth. Secondly, accountability occurs best in small groups, not in isolation. Isolation typically leads to stagnation, depression, and loneliness. I’m an introvert so I need some alone time, but too much alone time is a dangerous trap. We grow best together, whether we’re focused on exercise, spiritual growth, or breaking a bad habit. Small groups provide opportunities for love, support, accountability, and service.
I currently attend several small groups a week. I encourage you to make small group attendance one of your spiritual practices. Thanks for staying connected to Spirituality Adventures.
You just call on me brother [sister]
When you need a hand
We all need somebody to lean on
I just might have a problem that you’ll understand
We all need somebody to lean on
Shalom
©realfredherron, 2021
