Surgery and Recovery

It’s been hard to write blogs (typing is painful) and concentrate the last two weeks (May 1, 2022). I’ve experienced a great deal of pain and had to take short-term prescription pain meds due to shoulder surgery. Many people have extended thoughts, prayers, and concerns as I go through this new challenge. Some of the concerns have revolved around the prescription pain meds and my previous issues with substance abuse. This is actually the second time I’ve had to take short-term pain meds due to injury since I have been in recovery. Two years ago I broke my collar bone and was on short-term pain meds. Two weeks ago I went through rotator cuff surgery. The surgeon repaired three torn ligaments in my right shoulder with five anchors and removed a bone spur. The recovery has been painful and slow. As I think about the process of recovery from surgery, it can serve as a metaphor for recovery of all types.

In most ways, I feel like my life has been going through surgery and recovery for the last three years—emotionally, spiritually, relationally—and even physically. In general, emotional recovery from loss of friendship, loss of community, loss of faith, loss of a loved one, loss of employment, or emotional recovery from divorce, addiction, or illness has many parallels to physical recovery from surgery. Here are a few thoughts regarding the process of recovery.

Source of pain. For adults, before we begin a process of recovery, there is usually a large amount of pain. Two months ago I tore my rotator cuff due to a mountain biking crash while cycling on some frozen, icy trails. Over three years ago, I went through a personal crisis involving ministry burnout, insomnia, chronic marriage issues, and Xanax and alcohol abuse which resulted in a loss of community, marriage, friendships, career, stature, and faith. Pain can come suddenly due to unforeseen circumstances or it can build slowly over years until it hits a tipping point.

Surgery—More pain. At some point we may need surgery—emotionally or physically. The pain becomes too disruptive to our lives or the lives of those around us. If we desire healing and recovery, we must submit ourselves to more pain. It’s ironic. There is a pain that destroys and a pain that heals. Surgery is painful. Rehab is painful. But it’s a necessary pain for which we must volunteer, if we want to heal and recover. Emotional surgery is a painful process of humility and rigorous honesty with ourselves. We must also assemble a team of people to help us. Surgery is not something we can do in isolation by ourselves. We must find a surgical team—pre-op, op, and post-op.

Therapy—More pain. Therapy is painful. When I was going through physical therapy for a knee surgery in my late twenties, I had a sweet female therapist whom I lovingly called my torture therapist. She put me through a great deal of pain, but got me walking again. Emotional therapy can cause emotional pain as well. We must grapple with the hurts others have caused us and face the negative beliefs we have about ourselves, others, and God. We must dig deep, face our demons, and take responsibility for the pain we have caused ourselves and others. We must also commit to forgive those who have hurt or injured us. Therapy is not something we can do in isolation by ourselves. We need close friends, sponsors, pastors, therapists, and grace-based communities to help guide us on the road to recovery.

I have a therapist, a sponsor, close friends, family, doctors, and friends in recovery who truly know me. They know my past struggles. They know my current struggles. They also check in with me on a regular basis. This type of support is vital for recovery.

Recovery. My least favorite part of recovery is how slow it seems to go. Emotional recovery, depending on the circumstances, can be a process that takes years. Physical recovery can be a process that takes weeks, months, or years. I have been told that the type of shoulder surgery I have undergone can take at least three to six months to recover. So, even though I can be very impatient when it comes to the time-line of recovery (I want to speed everything up), I am grateful for the grace-based, recovery-oriented community of friends, family, and professionals that surround me. Thanks for all your thoughts and prayers.

Shalom

©realfredherron, 2022